How To Reduce Stress in Your Life and Leadership

This is a simple and personal article on how to reduce stress and live with less anxiety. There are no magic pills but there are reliable principles and practices. They are simple in concept but hard to consistently apply. But they work.

There are a lot of stresses in our lives. As superintendent of a large school I live with a degree of low level stress that can spike significantly depending on people and circumstances. As a human being I am daily confronted with the stresses of daily living—family, financial, social, and physical, not to mention the stress that can be brought to bear from national and international affairs.

As Jesus said, “In the world you will have tribulation.” But he also said, “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

I want peace and I bet you do too—especially peace of mind and soul.
Over the last several months the Lord has taught me how to biblically and effectively reduce stress and anxiety. I am learning to be at peace just a Paul learned to be content (Phil. 4:11).

I have come to realize and accept that I cannot avoid situations or people that produce anxiety and stress, I can only respond to them correctly or incorrectly, effectively or ineffectively, biblically or unbiblically.

Here are the simple principles I am learning to practice. Even though the circumstances have not changed, I have experienced much less anxiety when I focus on doing the following things.

Pray for Wisdom
This is a two-fold prayer for wisdom; the wisdom to respond to the situation correctly and the wisdom to deal with difficulties biblically. Wisdom comes from the illumination of the Holy Spirit applying God’s word to our minds, which requires that we make the study and memorization of God’s word a priority in our lives or we cannot have wisdom. Wisdom also comes from the counsel of spiritually mature and biblically literate Christians.

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Rom. 12:2

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. James 1:5 (Note that in context this verse is referring to the wisdom needed to respond to trials properly (See 1:1–4)

But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. James 3:17–18 (Note the characteristics of God-given wisdom)

A wise man is full of strength, and a man of knowledge enhances his might, for by wise guidance you can wage your war, and in abundance of counselors there is victory. Prov. 24:5–6

Learn to Listen
Listening is the handmaiden to wisdom. We cannot grow in wisdom and understanding if we focus on talking and defending. If one is to respond wisely to trials and tribulations brought on by the actions of others we must stop and listen honestly to what others are saying. Seek more to understand than to defend and explain. As Stephen Covey wrote, “seek first to understand and then to be understood.”

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. James 1:19–20

When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent. Prov. 10:19

Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent. Prov. 17:27–28

Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. Prov. 27:6

Speak the Truth in Love
People are the primary source of stress and anxiety. Of course, we usually think that other people produce stress and that we don’t. The truth is that we also produce stress for others.

We make two mistakes in responding to the words and actions of others that produce stress in our lives. We avoid speaking the truth so we are not dealing honestly with others. We are avoiding conflict. We are more concerned with being comfortable than we are promoting truth.

Our other mistake is to permit the pendulum to swing in the opposite direction. We are quick to speak the truth but we are not motivated by the welfare of the other person; we are motivated by our welfare. We are not speaking the truth in a loving manner.

Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ. Eph. 4:15

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 1 Cor. 13:1

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Gal. 6:1

By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.

Just Do the Right Thing
After praying for wisdom to know how to respond and after listening and speaking the truth in love, commit yourself to do the right thing, period. We are not responsible for the actions of others, we are responsible for ours.

But be careful. The right thing may not be what you perceive to be right. The right thing is what is right based on biblical principles and the wise, if uncomfortable, advice of others.

Doing the right thing may cost you. The right thing may require turning the other cheek. The right thing may be graciously and willingly submitting to authority even if you believe that authority is wrong. Doing the right thing may, and often does, require that you humble yourself. Doing the right thing may require giving up your rights, denying yourself. Doing the right thing most certainly requires holding your tongue and not gossiping about others and how they are mistreating you.

Just do what is right. We cannot control what others do. We can seldom control our circumstances. What we can control, as a Fruit of the Spirit, are our words and actions.

But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you. Matt. 5:39–42

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor. James 4:10–12

Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you. Heb. 13:17

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Phil. 2:3–4

Trust the Lord’s Providence
After praying for wisdom, listening to others, speaking the truth in love, and then doing the right thing—leave the outcome to God’s wisdom, goodness, and providence. You have done what you can and should do, you must trust in and be willing to accept God’s providence even if it is a frowning one.

God does not promise that if we do the right things others will do right by us. He does not promise that if we do the right thing he will prevent bad things from happening to us. To the contrary, the Bible is very clear—the righteous often suffer unjustly. Accept it. Expect it. Even embrace it as good for you.

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:2ff

Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. 1 Pet. 5:5–7

The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:5–7

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. Rom. 8:28

Who has spoken and it came to pass, unless the Lord has commanded it? Is it not from the mouth of the Most High that good and bad come? Why should a living man complain, a man, about the punishment of his sins. Lam. 3:37–38

In the day of prosperity be joyful, and in the day of adversity consider:God has made the one as well as the other, so that man may not find out anything that will be after him. Ecclesiastes 7:14

But he said to her, “You speak as one of the foolish women would speak. Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?” In all this Job did not sin with his lips. Job 2:10

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die … a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance. Ecclesiastes 3:1ff

Life is full of trouble and turmoil but our hearts and minds do not need to be troubled. We can reduce stress and anxiety in our lives but only if we apply biblical principles to our thoughts and actions:

• Pray for Wisdom
• Learn to Listen
• Speak the Truth in Love
• Do the Right Thing
• Trust the Lord’s Providence

If you and I will learn to consistently apply these principles then we can learn:

not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Phil 4:5–7

Shalom

18 Ways to Make YOUR Superintendent Very Unhappy

Eighteen Ways to Make YOUR Superintendent Very Unhappy Guest Article, Bruce Johnson

Things brought to him as superintendent for almost three decades.

1. Gossip in the Teachers’ Room and don’t hold anyone accountable for anything they say (and don’t let anyone hold you accountable for anything you say).

2. Trust students (or your spouse) to keep confidences about other students or staff.

3. Break confidences that you have with parents by “sharing” with other parents, co-workers or your spouse.

4. Keep confidences you shouldn’t keep (moral, ethical, legal).

5. Discuss students with other student’s parents.

6. Miss deadlines for grades or reports – or anything else – if you feel you have something more important to do.

7. Teach whatever you want to teach – regardless of the approved curriculum.

8. Be tardy to devotions, staff meetings and class.

9. Question everything – all the time – after all, you know better than anyone else.

10. Tell everyone else before you tell your administrator any complaints you may have about the school or him – or her.

11. Make excuses for your mistakes and never, ever take responsibility for anything that goes wrong.

12. Don’t volunteer for anything at any time, no matter how much everyone else is doing or how much your assistance is needed.

13. Ask for special favors and exceptions to policies that apply to everyone else.

14. Don’t dress or act professionally – and complain if you disagree with any guidelines, decisions regarding curriculum or anything else.

15. Don’t be careful what you say or how you say it to students or your co-workers.

16. Recognize that the Fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22,23 does not apply to you.

17. Don’t be loyal to the Lord, or school, or each other.

18. Remember that the school is fortunate to have you on staff.

8 Important Words to Use as a Leader

The pen is mightier than the sword. Edward Bulwer-Lytton

My life was unalterably changed by a few words. I was, at the time, an average student. I did what was necessary to get by but my academic ambitions and motivation were limited.

None of my family had attended college and some had not graduated from high school. I never recall hearing the word college in my home. In fact, education was so undervalued in my home that I recall a time when my mother scolded me for using “big words” when I returned home during a college break.

Something remarkable had happened several years before this sad episode with my mother. As I recall, I was a ninth grade student standing in the lunch line when a student tapped me on the shoulder and pronounced, “You would make a great attorney.” The unexpected compliment arose from my performance in English class as the defense attorney defending Brutus’s participation in the assassination of Julius Caesar. Was Brutus a patriot or traitor? I argued that his actions were noble, animated by his desire to protect the Roman Republic from dictatorship. A jury of ninth grade English students acquitted him.

Those few words, “You would make a great attorney,” caused me to think about college for the first time in my life. From that point forward I applied myself to my studies and went on to earn a doctorate. My life would have been dramatically different but for those few words of encouragement.

The moral of this story is that words are powerful—they can change a life or a school for good or bad. The start of a new school year is a good time to consider the words we use as leaders. It is a good time to unsheathe your most powerful leadership tool—your words.

These words or communication traits will make you a wiser person and more effective leader.

Empathy

Strive to put yourself in the other person’s shoes no matter how obnoxious their words or actions may be. This will give you a better perspective. As Becky Gaylord points out: “empathy leads to rational, thoughtful solutions.” Empathy has a calming and a rational impact on any conversation and is consistent with these two biblical principles:

So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. Mat. 7:12

Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Phil. 2:4

Employ the Wise Use of Humor

Appropriate humor reduces tension and can put all parties at ease in a difficult situation. Humor also makes for a more enjoyable workplace and is a great way to start a presentation. Interlacing appropriate and well timed humor into any conversation or presentation will increase effectiveness and help you connect with others.

Yes

No one likes to hear “no.” Although sometimes “no” is necessary, it is probably less necessary than you think. Sometimes we say “no” not because it is necessary but because it is easier. “Yes,” can create more work or complications for us. While saying yes may produce more work in the short-term, remember that a history of wise “yes” responses makes the necessary “nos” more palatable and leads to long-term positive relationships and school culture.

Please

No matter how exalted your position, “please” is almost always appropriate. Hopefully you learned this as a young child. Saying please is not only polite, it has the benefit of making it easier for people to accept a directive. While compliance may not be optional, saying please demonstrates courtesy and humility. Saying please makes it easier for others to comply willingly.

Thank you

Thankfulness is a constant theme in the Bible. We are admonished to be thankful and to express thankfulness. Never miss an opportunity to thank students, parents, employees, or vendors.

Listen, Really Listen

Our natural tendency is to talk. It is far wiser to follow the biblical command to “be quick to hear, slow to speak” (James 1:19), which was paraphrased by Steven Covey who said, “seek first to understand and then to be understood.” Listening leads to understanding, empathy, and better decisions and relationships. Click here for tips on how to actively listen.

Trust

While a leader must avoid being uniformed or naive, start with trust. This is the position that great leaders start from when dealing with others. Assume the best, give the judgment of charity, for Paul writes:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Cor. 13:4–7

I am Sorry

Saying I'm sorry is the handmaiden of humility. If we are humble we will quickly acknowledge our mistakes and sins and readily apologize. Pride does not say I am sorry. Becky Gaylord is correct when she asserts, “This word has prevented lawsuits, mended friendships and almost surely avoided wars. Too many bosses don’t use it — or know the magic it can create. Great leaders know it, and use it.”

Your words are the most powerful leadership tool you have. Use them wisely.

12 Quick Tips for Writing a Professional Email

This article has been adapted from an article of the same name posted on About.Com: Grammar and Composition.

How you communicate is essential for your effectiveness and leadership. Spending a few minutes reflecting on how to improve your communications can enhance your leadership and help you achieve the results you are seeking.

Despite the popularity of texting and social media, email remains one of the most common forms of written communication–and the most commonly abused. Consider this email message recently sent to all staff members on a large university campus:

It is time to renew your faculty/staff parking decals. New decals are required by Nov. 1. Parking Rules and Regulations require that all vehicles driven on campus must display the current decal.

Instead, consider how much nicer and more effective the email would be if we simply added a “please” and addressed the reader directly:

Please renew your faculty/staff parking decals by November 1.

Of course, if the author of the email had been keeping his readers in mind, he might have included another useful tidbit: a clue as to how and where to renew the decals.

The Tips

1. Always fill in the subject line with a descriptive topic that means something to your reader: Not “Decals” or “Important!” but “Deadline for New Parking Decals.” Keep it short and descriptive. Taking time to write a good subject line has two advantages: 1) It helps the recipient know why the email is important and should be read and 2) It will help you and the recipient find the email later if needed. Never leave the subject line blank.

2. Do not “hijack” an email. Hijacking is starting a new subject in an existing email conversation. This is confusing and makes finding the needed email later much more difficult.

3. Put your main point in the opening sentence. Most readers won’t stick around for a surprise ending. Get to the point immediately.

4. Never begin a message with a vague “This”–as in “This needs to be done by 5:00.” Always specify what you’re writing about.

5. Don’t use ALL CAPITALS (no shouting!), or all lower-case letters either. Using ALL CAPS is hard to read and comes across as rude and unprofessional.

6. As a general rule, PLZ avoid “textspeak” (abbreviations and acronyms): you may be ROFLOL (rolling on the floor laughing out loud), but your reader may be left wondering WUWT (what’s up with that).

7. Be brief. If your message runs longer than two or three short paragraphs, consider (a) reducing the message, (b) providing an attachment, or (c) picking up the phone and calling.

Keep you paragraphs short and whenever appropriate, use bullet points for key information. Consider bolding important information. For example, when sending an email about a meeting, consider using bullet points and bold to make it easy for your recipient to spot the important details: 

• Meeting Date: xxxx 
• Meeting Time: xxxx
• Meeting Location: xxxx

8. Limit the number of recipients for your emails. To combat the wasted time associated with emails send and/or copied to too many employees, Ferrari just implemented a new policy putting the brakes on staff emails.

The luxury car manufacturer said it was targeting time wasting and inefficiency by limiting the number of people staff can send emails to. From now on, each Ferrari employee would only be able to send the same email to three people in-house, Ferrari said in a statement. "Ferrari's employees will be talking to their colleagues more from today forward," Ferrari said.

"To incentivise more efficient and direct communication within the company, the decision has been made to place much stricter limits on the number of emails being sent.'' … The injudicious sending of emails with dozens of recipients often on subjects with no relevance to most of the latter is one of the main causes of time wastage and inefficiency in the average working day in business,'' Ferrari said.

"Ferrari has therefore decided to nip the problem in the bud by issuing a very clear and simple instruction to its employees: talk to each other more and write less."

9. Remember to say “please” and “thank you.” Always be courteous, friendly, and professional.

10. Add a signature block with appropriate contact information (in most cases, your name, business address, and phone number. Do you need to clutter the signature block with a clever quotation and artwork? Probably not.

11. Edit and proofread before hitting “send.” You may think you’re too busy to sweat the small stuff, but unfortunately your reader may think you’re a careless dolt.

12. Finally, reply promptly to serious messages. If you need more than 24 hours to collect information or make a decision, send a brief response explaining the delay.

Following these tips will make your communication more effective and professional. They will also enhance your leadership and be a blessing to those who receive your emails.

Google

They're Coming! How to Deal with the End of Year Disgruntled Parent

I am blessed. Even though we serve nearly 2,000 students representing 1,200 families, I have few disgruntled or complaining parents. This is a reflection of God’s great blessings on the school and a tribute to our fine teachers, coaches, and administrators.

Nevertheless, at the end of every school year I inevitably hear from a few parents who wait until school is out to express “a concern they have had all year.” My first question to these parents is, “why haven’t you shared your concern with the teacher this year?” The almost universal and unfounded response…”I was afraid the teacher would take it out on my child.”

In all of my years in school administration, I am unaware of any teacher ever “taking it out” on a student because the parent expressed a concern. The opposite is more likely. To avoid conflict, teachers are more apt to be overly cautious when dealing with the student of a complaining parent.

Anticipating that you may have a few of these “end of year meetings,” here are a few tips that may help you achieve a positive outcome, one that deepens the parent’s commitment to the school, lessens your stress, and is honoring to the Lord.

Pray: Pray for wisdom and a teachable spirit. Even though the parent’s approach may be wrong, there still may be information that you need to hear.

Actively Listen: Our natural tendency is to be defensive of the school and the teacher. It is far wiser to follow the biblical command to “be quick to hear, slow to speak,” (James 1:19), which was paraphrased by Steven Covey who said, “seek first to understand and then to be understood.” Click here for quick tips on how to actively listen.

Take Notes: This will help you listen actively and shows genuine interest and concern. It also promotes accuracy and provides a written record of the meeting.

Maintain the High Moral Ground and Self Control: No matter how rude, inappropriate, angry, or offensive the speaker may be, the Christian professional, controlled by the Spirit, will not respond in kind. Instead, turn the other cheek. Take the abuse. Bless those who “curse you.” And remember, “a soft answer turns away wrath but a harsh word stirs up anger.” (Prov. 15:1)

Give Assurance: Give assurance that you genuinely care (make sure you do!) and that you will prayerfully and carefully investigate the matter and will respond appropriately. Your assurance must be full of integrity. Do not say you will deal with the matter and then fail to do so.

Wait Before Indicating a Decision: Depending on the situation, it is tempting to being closure to the matter during the meeting. For example, if you prematurely conclude that the concern has no merit you may be tempted to dismiss the concern during the meeting. Or, if you believe the concern has merit, you will be tempted to explain how you will address the matter. Both responses are usually premature in this first meeting. It is far better to assure the parent that you will look into the concern, take time to investigate the facts, pray for wisdom, and then and only then decide on a course of action. Most of the time, there is more to the story than you are hearing. “The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.” (Prov. 18:17)

Reinforce the Matthew 18 Principle: I have found that even when parents are aware of the Matthew 18 principle, they almost always have an excuse for not following it. “I know but….” is a common response. Nevertheless, you need to inform the parent that in the future you will not meet with him or her until they have addressed the matter with the teacher. If the matter is not resolved at that level the parent must meet with the teacher’s immediate supervisor before coming to you. This needs to be said gently but clearly and then followed unless the matter is legal or immoral in nature.

Follow-up: It is very important that you do what you say and that you follow-up with the parent after you have reached a decision about your response. It is inconsiderate and unprofessional not to follow-up. This does not mean that you should disclose everything you have or will do. You must protect the privacy of students, parents, and staff but the parent who took the time to meet with you deserves to hear back from you.

By wisely, lovingly, and respectfully responding to concerns, you have the opportunity to turn a complaining parent into an appreciative one. In the long run, this is pleasing to the Lord and good for your school.

Google

Do We Talk Too Much? "How to Speak More Strategically"

We talk too much.  As school leaders this is problematic for several reasons:

• It places the focus on us rather than on others or organizational initiatives
• It raise questions about our motivations
• It may discourage input and candor from others
• Sharing more information than needed may create problems or complicate existing ones
• It may cause us to miss critical information because we are so focused on what we want to say , which can lead to misunderstanding and/or bad decisions

For these reasons and more, the Bible gives simple, straightforward advice:

• Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger… (James 1:19)
• When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent. (Proverbs: 10:19)
• Do you see a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him. (Proverbs 29:20)

Because I'm convinced that we often talk too much, I found this article by Mr. Bregman to be relevant and insightful.   This is a guest post by Mr. Peter Bregman and is posted with permission.   The article was originally published in Harvard Business Review," click here.

Peter Bregman is the CEO of Bregman Partners, Inc., a global management consulting firm which advises CEOs and their leadership teams. He speaks, writes, and consults about how to lead and how to live. He is the author, most recently, of 18 Minutes: Find Your Focus, Master Distraction, and Get the Right Things Done, winner of the Gold medal from the Axiom Business Book awards, named the best business book of  the year on NPR, and selected by Publisher’s Weekly and the New York Post as a top 10 business book. He is also the author of Point B: A Short Guide to Leading a Big Change and co-author of five other books. Featured on PBS, ABC and CNN, Peter is a regular contributor to Harvard Business Review, Fast Company, Forbes, National Public Radio (NPR), Psychology Today, and CNN.  Peter can be reached at www.peterbregman.com.

How to Speak More Strategically

It had been three weeks since my throat started to feel sore, and it wasn't getting better. The pain was most acute when I spoke. So I decided to spend a few days speaking as little as possible. Every time I had the urge to say something, I paused for a moment to question whether it was worth irritating my throat.

This made me acutely aware of when and how I use my voice. Which led me to a surprising discovery: I spend considerable energy working against my own best interests. And if my experience listening to others is any indication, so do you.  In my observations, we speak for three main reasons:

• To help ourselves
• To help others
• To connect with each other

That's not surprising. All three of those objectives are legitimate and worthwhile.

What is surprising though is how frequently we fool ourselves into thinking we're achieving those objectives when, in reality, we're thwarting them. The more I listened, the more I noticed how we undermine our own interests.

Frequently, I had the urge to gossip about someone else. I realized that I did this to help myself (I will feel better if I think I'm better than that person) and to connect with the other gossipers. But clearly that would distance me from the people about whom I was gossiping. In fact, it would probably even distance me from my fellow gossipers too; who could trust someone who talked behind other people's back? My attempt to strengthen relationships was, instead, hurting them.

I also had the urge to share information when I thought it would be helpful to someone. That's a productive reason to speak. But several times I had the urge to say something simply to show that I knew the answer. Or to get attention. Or to increase my power in the group. It became clear to me that my urge to speak in those moments came from my desire to feel special. I wanted people to like me and to think highly of me. But who likes the guy trying to show off?

Sometimes I wanted to help myself by getting the answer to a question, or making sure I was counted in a decision. That's useful. But other times, I just wanted to make sure my voice was heard over the din of the other voices. I caught myself wanting to speak over someone in a meeting. Or arguing a point to get others to agree with me so I'd feel more confident in my own opinion (which I'm hearing a lot this political season). Is that really helping someone else?

In fact, I was amazed at how often I wanted to speak simply to assure myself that I was here. I had a role. I was noticed.

As I sat silently, trying to preserve my voice, I had the opportunity to notice how and when other people spoke as well. And I noticed all the same tendencies.

If I were to reduce our counter-productive speaking to a single motivation, it would be this: We often speak to make ourselves feel better in the short-term.

But life and relationships are long-term. And when we gossip, raise our voices, speak behind other people's backs, offer unsolicited opinions, or make jokes at other people's expense we're isolating ourselves over time.

There was some good news in my experience of talking less: I listened more. And listening, it turned out, was a much more productive way to achieve my speaking objectives than speaking.

When I listened, I helped myself, helped others and built relationships at least as effectively as I did speaking and with much less collateral damage.

I'm obviously not suggesting we stop speaking; we can't achieve our three objectives unless we do. We need ask for things. We need to share information. And there are a number of ways — like offering compliments and rephrasing what we're hearing — we can build relationships through speech.

I am, however, suggesting that we think ahead — long term — when we're about to say something in the moment. And that, before speaking, we ask ourselves one simple question: Is what I'm about to say going to detract from one of the three reasons I speak? If the answer is yes, consider saving your voice.

My throat is better now and I can speak as much as I want. Which left me feeling a little nervous; now that I know how easy it is to be self-defeating, will I keep myself on the productive side of the speaking equation?

Thankfully, the sore throat left me with a gift: the memory of a sore throat.

These past few days, when I get the urge to talk, I find myself doing a little calculation in my head: If I only have so much speaking I can do in a day, is this thing I'm about to say a worthwhile use of my voice?

What's amazing is that most of the time I immediately know.

How to Design & Deliver High Impact Presentations: Before & After Examples

Leaders make presentations. Transformative leaders deliver inspirational, informative, and persuasive presentations.

Good presentations are hard to design and deliver, which is why we have suffered through so many poorly delivered seminars and workshops. Although I like to think of myself as a decent speaker and presenter, the truth is that I’ve given my share of poor keynotes and boring seminars.

Fortunately for those who must listen to me (my staff) and those who will do so voluntarily during conferences, graduate classes, and workshops, I’m improving. My growth in giving higher impact presentations is the result of reading articles and books, the critique of others, and trial and error. I offer the following tips with the hope that you can benefit from my reading and experience.

PREPARATION

Preparation Time

The amount of time that you spend on your presentation will vary based on the subject and context but in general, a 30-60 minute high impact presentation will require 36-90 hours of preparation. You read that right; a quality one hour presentation = 36-90 hours of preparation.

Presentation authority Nancy Duarte, author of the book Slideology and principal at Duarte Design (clients include Apple, Cisco, and Al Gore among many others), puts it this way; “The amount of time required to develop a presentation is directly proportional to how high the stakes are.” Duarte goes on to provide this guidance:

• 6-20 Hours Research and collect input from the web, colleagues, and the industry
• 1 hour Build an audience-needs map
• 2 hours Generate ideas via sticky notes
• 1 hour Organize the ideas
• 1 hour Have colleagues critique or collaborate around the impact the ideas will have on the audience
• 2 hours Sketch a structure and/or a storyboard
• 20-60 hours Build the slides in a presentation application
• 3 hours Rehearse, rehearse, rehearse (in the shower, on the treadmill, or during your commute)

Total Time: 36-90 hours

Is that accurate? Thirty six to ninety hours for a one hour presentation given all that I have to do? For what it is worth, that has been my experience lately. It takes a long time to prepare a good presentation. I have spent hours over several weeks preparing and designing presentations.

You are a steward not only of your time but of your audience’s time as well. Don’t waste your time or theirs by giving a poorly designed and delivered presentation. Don’t abuse your audience with a mediocre presentation.

I recommend that you schedule time throughout the week for several weeks to prepare your presentation. Your preparation time will be more efficient if you work on it in small, frequent chunks over an extended period of time.

Know your Audience

Your presentation is not about you; it is about your audience and what they need to hear, learn, and/or do. Your presentation is a service to them.

To serve your audience well you need to know them and their perceived as well as real needs. If I am speaking to an outside group I make it a habit to ask my host the following questions:

• How many will be in attendance?
• What is the average age?
• What is the average educational level?
• What will be the gender mix: balanced, mostly women, mostly men?
• If this is a school audience, are most in attendance teachers, administrators, board members? If all three, in what proportion?
• What are the primary areas of interest or concern of this audience regarding this topic? What are some of their likely questions?

Tailor your presentation to your audience. The stories you tell, the examples used, and the graphics employed should match the demographics and needs of your audience. Otherwise your presentation will be largely irrelevant.

Know the Venue

To prepare properly you need to know the venue and to request things that you may need. I typically ask:

• What type of room/auditorium will I be in?
• What type of sound and video equipment will be available?
• Will I be controlling my slides or will you have an AV tech. assisting?
• Will there be a podium mic? May I use a lapel mic.? (I prefer a lapel or head mic so that I am not restricted to standing behind a podium.)
• I am using a Mac/Windows PC, can I load my PowerPoint/Keynote presentation on the local computer or do I need to have my computer on the platform?

SLIDE DESIGN-Less is MORE!

Less is MUCH MORE! This is probably the most important lesson I have learned from my reading and my experience. Keep it simple, clean, and elegant. Remove everything that is not absolutely necessary on your slides and charts.

Less is more-fewer slides, fewer points, less text, and less time.

This is harder than it seems! We want to add information, not eliminate it. When designing your slides keep the following in mind:

• You want to talk to your audience and you want them to listen and watch you. You do not want them reading slides!
• Slides are NOT a teleprompter! Do not design and use slides as an outline of your talk.
• Slides are used to illustrate key points. They should be simple, clear, and uncluttered.
• Eliminate most transition effects--they distract from your presentation.
• Have few to no bullet points.
• You should seldom have more than six to eight words on a slide.
• Use large easy to read font.
• Use consistent font styles and colors.
• Do not use clip art! It is cheesy and unprofessional. Find good photographs or graphics.

You should seldom use template designs for the same reason--they are distracting. Here is an example of a distracting verses a good slide template:

Distracting Template:

Good, Clean Template:

Good and Bad Examples

Assuming that a “picture is worth a thousand words,” here are some examples of before and after designs. Many of these are slides that I have produced--both good and bad and a few are provided from other sources as examples. My slides are indicated by the initials BLM.

THE BAD

BLM (Cheesy clipart, poor color selection, distracting text)

BLM (Boring with no graphics or illustration, small font, too many bullet points)

BLM (This one is so bad it is just embarrassing. There is nothing good about this slide. The graphics are terrible. Too many bullet points. Font too small. Poor color selection.)

BLM (The slide has too much text, which is too small. The illustration is poorly done and the overall impact of the slide is boring and distracting.)

BLM (The slide has too much text and cheesy clip art.)

THE BETTER

Here is the same topic being covered with a redesigned slide from the one above.

BLM (This one has no clipart and no text. A high quality photo covering the entire slide is used. The photo speaks for itself. It is much more impactful than the one before with the same point to make.)

BLM (This title slide is affective because the professional photo reinforces the title, which is very short and to the point. The photo also matches the audience, this presentation was given in Canada in the winter.)

BLM (One word with a photo matching the key concept.)

BLM (Transition slide to next topic--simple text on solid background)

BLM (This is a playful slide using a professional photo but with a font matching the playful mood. This slide was designed to communicate with and encourage elementary teachers thus the colors and playfulness, which are characteristic of elementary programs.)

The following five slides tell a story and reinforce each other.

• Slide 1 acknowledges how many feel when faced with significant change.
• Slide 2 encourages the audience to laugh and relax because we will provide time and resources to ensure their success.
• Slide 3 reassures that we are confident that they will be successful as a team.
• Slide 4 reassures that we are confident of success because….
• Slide 5 communicates that we will deal with big change in small bites.
• Slide 6 illustrates why they will be successful--a slow, deliberate training and implementation cycle.

BLM Slide 1

BLM Slide 2

BLM Slide 3

BLM Slide 4

BLM Slide 5

BLM Slide 6 This slide has animations so that each date appears and disappears in sequence.

A Word About Charts and Numbers

Charts can be very helpful in a presentation but just like your slides they need to be simple with all distracting and unnecessary elements deleted.

Numbers are usually confusing to the audience. Use as few as possible and allow extra time for the audience to do the math. Numbers should never be ultra precise: “Anticipated revenues of $660,101.83” looks silly. Are your numbers that accurate? Just say $660 thousand.
This is a busy, hard to read and understand chart with too many words and numbers.

BLM This chart is much better. Easy to understand, clean with no distracting elements, e.g., grid lines, unnecessary numbers, and text.

DELIVERY

Arrive Early and Test Everything!

It is stressful and embarrassing to stand up to deliver a presentation only to discover that something is not working. Worse, it is distracting to your audience and immediately reduces your credibility and impact.

You only have about 1 minute to make a first impression. Don’t make it with you trying to get your computer to work or your slides to show up on the screen.

Plan for Murphy to show up. He always does. Plan for the worst case scenario. What will you do if the computer crashes and burns, the video system goes out, or the sound system does not work? Prepare for the unexpected. When you do, you can go with the flow and not skip a beat.

Have your presentation so well rehearsed that you do not need slides as prompts (more on this later). You should be able to speak spontaneously. If you can’t, you don’t know your subject well enough.

If you must have notes, have a printed copy readily available.

Have electronic backup copies of your slides on a thumb drive (for use on a local computer if yours crashes) and your online for immediate download if needed. I use an iPad for this purpose.

Have copies of your notes and slides available for distribution or access online.

Talk to Your Audience, Do Not Read!

Whatever you do do NOT look at your slides and read from them! Keep your eyes on your audience. Make eye contact with individual audience members.

Remember, your slides are to illustrate key ideas, concepts, trends, and facts. Do not use your PowerPoint or Keynote presentation as a teleprompter.

Presentation Style Tips

Remember, your audience will form a first impression within 60 seconds or less! Make that first minute count!

• Dress appropriately for your audience. It is best to “dress up” rather than “down” if in doubt.
• Tell real life stories that reinforce your topic.
• Turn off your cell phone.
• Jump right in and get to the point.
• Give your rehearsed opening statement; don't improvise at the last moment.
• Use the opening to catch the interest and attention of the audience.
• Briefly state the problem or topic you will be discussing.
• Talk at a natural, moderate rate of speech.
• Project your voice.
• Speak clearly and distinctly.
• Speak with enthusiasm.
• Use appropriate well timed humor but not jokes.
• Pause briefly to give your audience time to digest the information on each new slide.
  Keep your eyes on the audience.
• Use natural gestures.
• Don’t turn your back to the audience.
• Don’t hide behind the lectern. As much as possible don’t use a podium at all but if you must or the host site has it there for other speakers, move in front or to the side.
• Avoid looking at your notes. Only use them as reference points to keep you on track. Talk, don’t read.

Length

• To end on time, you must PRACTICE!
• The audience will love you if you end short of your time. Never go over! Remember, less is MORE.
• As a rule of thumb, plan to use 80% of your allotted time.

Demeanor

Show enthusiasm. Nobody wants to listen to a dull presentation. On the other hand, don’t overdo it. Nobody talks and gestures like a maniac in real life. How would you explain your ideas to a friend?

Recommended Reading

All truth is God’s truth. We can learn from unbelievers because by God’s common grace he reveals truth to believers and unbelievers alike. Although I do not endorse everything in the following books (e.g., some have Buddhist and Zen philosophy embedded in them), nevertheless, some of the principles are true and can help anyone design and deliver better presentations.

• Made to Stick
• Presentation Zen
• Slide:ology